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Tuesday, July 28, 2009

C'est la vie...or is it?

Gah!! Where the hell did July go?!?

This is ridiculous. Summer is flying by...which scares me. The closer we get to fall, the closer we get to (dun dun duuuunnnn) HOLIDAY SEASON. *gasp!*

I know, I know. I should bite my tongue. But, in my line of work, the holidays are always in the back of your head, whether you like it or not. As a matter of fact, my boss and I were just discussing today (yes, today) the schedule of when we'll be getting our first shipments of holiday merchandise and how we plan to get it out. I KNOW! It's July!! I am having a hard time dealing with it, even after all these years. But, as they say, "C'est la vie," right? Right?!?

I don't know. Maybe not. I mean really...is this all there is? An endless hamster wheel of identical days, X-ed off boxes on a calendar, waking up day after day and doing the same thing over and over? The only thing that differentiates one month from the next is the color of the grass and the design on my garden flag (which right now has butterflies on it, just in case anyone was wondering). Or maybe just looking forward to the next holiday/gift giving/party planning event?

I'm just as guilty as the next guy (or gal, whatever). I get up, get ready for work, get the kiddo up and moving, go to daycare, work, back to daycare, home, dinner. Wash, Rinse, Repeat. There are few variations to this routine, and I just recently realized that my job is sucking all of the life out of me. I NEED to do something different, to feel like I'm a part of something bigger. Something that matters. There's so much that I have passion for, that I just don't get the time to do. Prime example -- photography. In a perfect world (or at least one where Fairy Godmothers exist), I would make a living taking pictures (and, I'd also ask my Fairy Godmother for my 21 year old body, but I digress). I LOVE my camera, it's like an extension of my arm sometimes. I am just too damn busy working and taking care of home and family to really get out and enjoy it. I really think there is more to me that what I'm doing right now. I am so much better than this!!

I've recently decided that I really want to go back to school. I want to do something to actually help people, and I don't mean help them find the aisle where the band aids are. So, stay tuned if you're interested in finding out how this will end. It should be an interesting ride!

Because, as they say, "C'est La VIE!"

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